Why I Love the British, Part 1

I was working my way through the Guardian newspaper the other week and while reading the Saturday Money section, noticed a column titled “Personal effects.” Readers write in with money-related problems via an online forum, and the question, with reader answers, are printed in the hard-copy paper.

On this particular Saturday, a woman wrote in about her tightwad husband who won’t let her put on the heating until the end of October (it wasn’t me honey, honest!). She asks for advice on how to get him to be a little less environmentally friendly. I do believe that only the British could offer these wonderfully funny, pragmatic replies:

“Central heating on: 29 October. First night when a winter coast is necessary: 5 November. Winter coat off: 14 March. Central heating off: 31 March. These are the immutable laws by which life must be lived. The actual weather on the dates specified is essentially irrelevant.

Hope that’s cleared things up.”

And,

“Tried and tested for warmth: A brisk walk; on return, don tights, thermals, fleecy bottoms, polo top, woolly jumper and finish the look with dressing gown, slippers, hat and fingerless gloves! Come the spring, when the layers come off, everyone thinks you’ve lost a stone (14 lbs in UK measurements). Trust me, I’m an expert.”

My favorite reply was this one:

“More worrying than your thermal underwear dilemma is the phrase: ‘My husband won’t let me’. Are you sure the Guardian is the paper for you?”

*All content in quotes above is property of the Guardian newspaper.

3 thoughts on “Why I Love the British, Part 1

  1. Claire

    Hope you’ve spotted the fabulous Saturday Guadian Review, a whole section on Literature, its one of my favourite things about visiting the UK, getting the Saturday Guardian, so I can bring back the review section.

    Gotta love the British sense of humour.

    Reply
  2. TheWritingReader (@WritingReader)

    “The actual weather on the dates specified is essentially irrelevant.’ Oh my land! That is hysterical! I am ever so grateful that this attitude is not carried over to air conditioning in the summer in Arizona! Then again, perhaps this is why I am single.

    Reply

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